Belltown Messenger

Back when I lived on Capitol Hill we would buy our beer and cigarettes at the local deli, or "death mart" as we called it, because they they sold only beer, cigarettes, and junk food. And, being the politicially incorrect person that I am, the man behind the counter was dubbed "the Korean Merchant of Death."

During the golden age of late-'90s Belltown, the place to get beer was the Golliwog Deli, which was part of the Korean American Grocers' Association. Beer and cigarettes were the featured products. All the other crap they sold in there, which was just window dressing for the beer and cigarettes, was marked up massively, as is the tradition with inner city "ghetto" minimarts preying upon those without access to proper supermarkets.

A real nice young couple with two cute, smart kids ran the Golliwog, seemingly oblivious that the name "Golliwog" is an antiquated racial slur. Their command of English was niggardly, or at least they pretended it was, and that gave me the heebie-jeebies.

Ah, the good old days. The husband once gave me homemade Kim Chee. My bike was stolen from outside there by an opportunistic junkie, and they let me call the police from their phone. The cops showed up instantly, but the dude was long gone. Another time some shady character walked out with a pack of cigarettes and the wife, who could not have been over four feet tall, jumped over the counter and had him floored in a fraction of a second. A vicious, lightning-fast message to someone who should know better: Don't f*ck with us.

The Golliwog sold its share of fortified beer and wine to hobos. That is how they made their money, these "death merchants," selling rotgut to the homeless, cheap ale to drunk beatniks, and cigarettes and junk snacks all day long to a steady cross-section of humanity.

The Golliwoggers worked ridiculously long hours, mostly 18-hour days. Their kids were in there a lot, helping out. How they were compensated by the Korean American Grocers' Association, I don't know or want to know.

I once suspected that they were Moonie-owned, like some of the Korean "delis" in New York City, but we here at the Belltown Messenger don't have the resources to confirm that. At least the Moonie places in New York had "sushi," Korean style thick-cut rolls. No attempt at fresh food at any of these Seattle joints.

Interestingly, Youngsu "Rocky" Kim, creator of the Korean American Grocers' Association, was murdered at his West Seattle minimart on October 30, 2000. In 2002 the Golliwog people were relcoated by their bosses to a rural store upstate after losing their lease to Taco Del Mar. Seattle chain Taco Del Mar, the worst taco place on the West Coast, is so bad it makes Taco Bell, the vile corporate multionational, seem like a fancy restaurant. Taco Del Mar is to Mexican food what the fast-food chain Magic Dragon is to Chinese food: Cheap slop not fit to be squeezed out the back of a donkey.

(Note to advertising department: do not approach the First and Blanchard Taco Del Mar for a few months. Their ad budget is probably all used up on those unimaginative TV commercials they pummel us with anyway.)

It was a shame to see the Goliwog Deli go. I felt sorry for the nice people who worked there, who did not seem to be in control of their own destiny.

-AM